The Taming of the Shrew in the Style of... 'Blind Date' by Sophie James
(Blind Date theme music.)
Graham: Hello and welcome to another programme of Blind Date. My name's Graham and here's your host Miss Cilla Black!!
(Enter Cilla. Applause/Cheering)
Cilla: : Hello chucks, I'm Cilla Black. Tonight we've got a fun-packed show as usual, where two lucky couples are going to be jetting off to an exotic place! I know, it's all very exciting! We're going to start off with three lucky lads. Come in boys!
(Enter 3 Lads)
Cilla: Hi there Lads!
Lads: Hi Cilla!
Cilla: You all look gorgeous tonight! OK let's start off. Number 1, what's your name, and where do ya come from?
Gremio: Hi there Cilla, my name's Gremio and I'm from Padua!
(Applause)
Cilla: Padua, that sounds lovely! Thanks Gremio. Now let's say hello to Number 2. What's ya name, and where do ya come from chuck?
Hortensio: Hi Cilla, my name's Hortensio and I'm from Padua as well!
(Applause)
Cilla: Thanks chuck. We're now gonna move onto our last and final contestant.... Number 3! Hello love, what's ya name and where do ya come from?
Lucentio: Hi there Cilla my names Lucentio and I'm from Pisa!
Applause.
Cilla: Well that's lovely chuck! I wish you all the best of luck! Now we're gonna meet our lovely lady, who's gonna be one of your dates! But we're gonna have to wait and find out who it's gonna be! See ya later boys!
(Cilla moves to other side of screen)
Cilla: Please welcome Bianca Minola, all the way from Padua!
(Applause. Enter Bianca. Cheering)
Cilla: Hello Bianca you look stunning!
Bianca: Thank you Cilla!
Cilla: So then love, are you looking forward to tonight?
Bianca: I am Cilla, very much so. I'm hoping to find 'Mr Right as my father says I have to find someone to marry soon!
(Laughter)
Cilla: He sounds very keen!
Bianca: Trust me Cilla he is!!
Cilla: OK then let's hopefully find 'Mr Right' by asking your fab three questions. Are you ready Bianca?
Bianca: Yes I am Cilla.
Cilla: Are you ready round there lads?
(Cilla looks round the screen and sticks her thumbs up)
Boys: Yes Cilla!
Cilla: OK Bianca fire way!
Bianca: Thanks Cilla. OK here's my first question.... Some people say that the best part of me is my face because I'm so pretty and I can get any man I set my mind on.
(Bianca giggles. Audience laughs with Cilla and 3 boys)
Cilla: Oh I say!
Bianca: So what's your favourite part of your body and why? This goes to Number 1.
Gremio: Hi there Bianca.
Bianca: Hi.
Gremio: Well I would have to say that my fine Italian looks are my favourite part, because once you've seen my face, you won't be able to keep away from me. You'll even be taking beauty tips off me!!
(Audience reacts with laughter and cooing)
Bianca: Oh crikey, and the same question to number 2 please.
Hortensio: Well I would have to say that my hands are my favourite part of my body because they are soft and delicate just like the way I'm going to treat you if you pick me tonight.
(Audience laughs)
Cilla: Ooh I say love!
Bianca: Thank you number 2. And the same to number 3.
Lucentio: Well my dark eyes must be the favourite part of my body. Once you look into my 'come to bed' eyes, you won't be able to look away ever again.
Audience giggles.
Bianca: Thank you number 3. My second question is: if you were an animal, what would you be and why? To number 3.
Lucentio: I'd have to be a cuddly bear, because I'm snugly and loving but fierce enough to protect you from any harm.
Cilla: Ooh, I think I'm gonna faint!
Bianca: Same question to number 2.
Hortensio: I'd have to be a dog - because I'm faithful and loyal and will never let you down.
Bianca: Ooh how sweet.
Gremio: I'd have to be a peacock because like me, they're beautiful creatures and like me, they will never fly away.
Bianca: Thank you number 3. My third and final question is: if you were trying to attract my attention and impress me. What would you do? Number 2 ?
Hortensio: I would have to send you a box of choccies, and a cinema ticket with a message saying, see you in Row 10 on Saturday night from your one and only true love!
Bianca: Ahh, and the same to number 1 please.
Gremio: Being a wealthy man I would flash my Porsche keys in front of you and say a nice simple chat-up line like 'Got ya love, you've just pulled!'
Cilla: Oh I say!
Bianca: Oh lovely - what about number 3?
Lucentio: Being a romantic, I would send you 12 red roses, stand underneath your bedroom window and recite a love scene from Romeo and Juliet.
(Audience 'ahhs'.)
Bianca: Ahh - how lovely!
Cilla: Well have ya made ya mind up love ? I have.
Bianca: I think so Cilla.
Cilla: Well don't say anything, cos here's our Graham with a quick recap!
Graham: Will you chose number 1, Gremio from Padua who will give you everything you need, but will never fly away? Or number 2, Hortensio from Padua, who will surprise you, and stay loyal and faithful? Or last but not least, number 3, Lucentio all the way from Pisa, who's the romantic, cuddly and loving, with dark eyes you just can't resist? The decision is yours!
(Theme Music.)
Cilla: Well love it's all up to you now, who are you gonna pick?
Bianca: Well Cilla - tonight I'm gonna pick number 3!
Cilla: Great, a good choice! But what about the 2 lovely lads you turned down? That was our Gremio from Padua. Come in Gremio.
(Enter Gremio, exchange of hugs and
kisses)
Cilla: And what about our Hortensio all the way from Padua as well! Come in Hortensio!
(Enter Hortensio, exchange hugs and kisses)
Cilla: But here's the lad you picked tonight, all the way from Pisa. Come in Lucentio!!
(Enter Lucentio. Both gasp, exchange hugs and kisses)
Cilla: What do you think of one another?
Bianca: Handsome!
Lucentio: Gorgeous!
Cilla: Who's gonna pick our lovely holiday?
Lucentio: Bianca can.
Bianca: Ohh thank you!
(Bianca picks envelope and opens, and gasps!)
Bianca: Oh wow a trip to the Maldives!!
Lucentio: Fabulous!!
Cilla: Here you are going to be spending your nights in a wonderful beach hotel. You will try a spot of scuba diving, and jet skiing! And spend your nights hand in hand along a moonlit beach!
Bianca: Sounds great!
Lucentio: Brilliant!!
Cilla: Well Bianca and Lucentio have a great time! Bianca, I hope you've found Mr Right!!
Bianca: I'm sure I have!!
Cilla: Tarra chucks! Have a super time.
Lucentio and Bianca: Bye Cilla!
(Exit Bianca and Lucentio waving. Applause)
Cilla: Tarra for now. Thank you for watching - see you next week for another edition of Blind Date!
(Exit Cilla. Blind Date theme music)
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